Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Loss

For the first time in my life, I took a gamble & lost. I found myself very unexpectedly pregnant. Irregularly pregnant from the start which is why I had no clue. Sure enough, even after the spotting my blood test revealed I still was. It has been an agonizing 2 weeks of high hopes & big time stress that came to an end so quickly with one quick call from the Dr's office today. My dreams of a china doll that looked like my mother or a new brother for my boys is no longer. I can still dream, can't I? I am so sad yet so relieved to have an outcome. I would have been a wreck with an irregular pregnancy as the stakes got higher, I would have so much more to lose than I already have.

2 comments:

Chelsea Ann said...

oh honey, I am so so sorry for you and your family. I can't possibly imagine your heartache, but I do know how the waiting and hoping can wear on you - as I have waiting 3 long years to get pregnant and still nothing. Hang in there and hold dear to all those around you.

HUGS! ~ Chelsea Ann

Alisa Noble said...

Aww, I'm so sorry, Jamie.